why you shouldn't annoy your tamer, your family or
by Sapphiet
Summary: these are mishaps that Dark seems to be causing and it always causes trouble for others but just how did it start in the first place? no pairings just anger and misery rated T
1. The worst Valentine

**I own nothing except the girl PS not meant to offend anyone**

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**why you shouldn't annoy your tamer, your family or bother a married woman on Valentine's Day**

**The worst Valentine's Day ever **

**Dark's first and final mistake**

I sat in boredom due to Dark forcing me to step aside due to him not being able to steal for 4 weeks to nearly a month, since the artworks were being moved to another area so he wasn't allowed to steal.

"Here Happy Valentines' day" Dark smiled.

"I hope you like flowers" he chirped while I glared weakly at it.

"It's a cactus Dark" I replied grimly. '_You brought me a cactus, you brought me- HE brought me a cactus! What a knob head!_' I thought angrily

"It's like saying do I ever want to go out with Kei Hiwatari or ever want to receive hugs from the git" I said with my arms crossed.

"It is a flower. It's a flower of the desert!" Dark explained while being all smart about it.

"No it's not and second there is no flower on top you dope. You've just been conned and also it's a cactus with spikes" I replied in a stressed out voice due to work.

"It is a flower, here smell it" he urged happily.

"No I don't want to-" I screamed out in pain as I held my right hand to my right cheek

"You idiot! You got my cheek!" I growled only to look at my cheek "oh dear gosh I'm bleeding, Krad! Get me a gauze! I'm bleeding" I called.

"Can I kiss it better?" he asked while making a kissing noise.

"Oh hell no! I think you've done enough damage as it is" I replied angrily.

"No, there's no blood, no blood...just romance" Dark said only to see my fist punch his nose.

**10 minutes later**

"You know Amina, half the stuff I do better than you anyways" Dark snapped after putting the cactus plant that he pricked me with on the window.

'_What the hell did you just say to me?_' I thought as I froze to look at him

"It ain't that hard" he growled only (BAD MOVE) to see me look at him angrily.

'_Oh no he did not just say that_' I glared.

"What? You've something to say?" he asked in a high voice, I snorted darkly as got up

'_Right that does it_' I thought.

**Warning the following scene has explicit nature that will affect fangirls. Viewing cautiously is advised otherwise run for the hills and away from the noise**

I span round once while saying:

"Well ain't that a BITCH!" I snapped as I threw glass at him.

**Outside**

The man flinched from the noise of glass.

"ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY! YOU DO MY JOB FOR 1 DAY!" a china plate was thrown at his head in the background "AND IT AIN'T THAT HARD!" I screamed as I threw a clay statue at him.

"You arrogant! Self-centered! Skinny assed! Sexist! Purple headed! BASTARD!" I screamed as I threw a chair causing a huge crash leaving some screaming in shock.

**3 hours later (usually it takes at least 1 hour with mum when it came to dad)**

"DO I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING PANSY MAID? NO!" I yelled as I threw the glass table at him while 15 people gasped in shock.

"daymn, remind me never to get on her bad side" said Uncle Jones (**is a colored guy but is called Uncle Jones)**

"YOU FUCKING USELESS TWISTED MALE CHAUVINISTIC! MISOGYNISTIC! PRICK!" I screamed as I threw Chase young's statue (**Xiaolin showdown don't own either**) causing more freak outs as Chase young, Wuya, Hannibal Roy bean who was thinking

'_Poor guy_' and Jack Spicer who flinched in fear while screaming like a girl.

**2 hours later**

"YOU MUST THINK THAT I AM CRAZY!" I screamed as I threw a cup at him.

"YOU CAN KISS MY AIN'T THAT HARD MIXED RACE ASS!" I yelled as I threw a Hikari art work statue at him. It screamed as soon as it was smashed before dying causing the people to run away in fear.

**Inside house**

"Have you lost your mind?" I asked as I went forward making him flinch in fear. I glared at him as I was going out the house.

Krad opened the door and entered in a shot.

"What the hell is going on?" Krad asked in shock only to flinch as he saw the mess as well as the dead art work.

"Can you clean this mess up now MR Perfect?" I asked only to start shouting again.

"DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!" I yelled before slamming the door leaving them gobsmacked.

(**and that was (like my mum) letting him off easy)

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**part 1 over please no flames  
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**_CHAUVINISTIC_**


	2. What Krad should never do to tick off

**Here is part 2**** PS I own nothing Except the girl like 1st chapter  
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**What Krad should never do to tick off his tamer if wanting to live.**

**Why he shouldn't ever listen OR help Dark in anyways that involved getting into trouble.**

**After the incident**

"Krad you have to help me here" Dark pleaded.

As Krad was trying to adjust to the fact she smashed an artwork out of pure blinded anger. He became pale as he thought about what would happen if he'd cross her like that.

"No way Dark! You saw how angry she got and you just pushed her. You've only yourself to blame" Krad wormed out in shock.

"Your tamer is **HER** cousin, if** He** finds his sacred maiden then **SHE** will be your tamer instead of his children" Dark warned.

Krad laughed which took Dark by surprise.

"Like hell that'll happen. If it did then I might as well be as soft as a kitten" Krad said which confused them both.

"Your hair is already like that" Dark said leaving Krad in a panic.

'_Would she be your tamer?_' Satoshi asked. Krad had become frozen in terror.

**Night time**

"Krad your still not thinking about what Dark said are you?" Satoshi asked... Silence.

"Fine" he sighed. "Go to sleep then see if I care" Satoshi muttered, only to hear Krad whimpering in his mind.

'_There are a few things that scare you and this is one of them_' Satoshi muttered even more.

'_Just shut up and go to sleep_' Krad growled (**He's back but for how long?**)

**6 months later (Uh oh)**

**First prov**

I got up as normal to stretch only to smile due to soft breathing inside my head.

"Morning Krad" I smiled as I got out of bed due to a hot day again.

'_Morning_' he mumbled while still in his side of his mind making me chuckle.

"Well I've got to work so I'll give you free reign of the house okay?" I asked before hearing a thump.

'_REALLY? Why? You never do that?_' Krad asked suspiciously but felt excited to be in his own body again.

"Well you know when you do something good I treat you for it. Count it as one and spearing you from a 6 hour work day nonstop at the police force" I replied with a smile.

'_OKAY!_' Krad chirped as his eyes glittered happily, '_I won't let you down_' Krad said in a hyper expression (**Big mistake**)

**6 hours later** (**I can't watch**)

I arrived at the front door to see Dark dressed up in messy punk clothes.

"Dark why the hell are you dressed up like that?" I asked in shock.

"I wanted to" Dark grinned and went off leaving me to shrug.

'_I just hope Krad's been looking after-_' I opened the door and froze '_The house'_

(**Tense music could be played here**)

I looked round and stared at Krad sleeping.

"Krad!" I yelled... No response. I blinked angrily.

"KRAD GET THE HELL OUT OF THAT COUCH NOW!" I screamed louder at his ear which jerked him awake.

"What is..." he froze at the mess.

"What in the world happened here?" I said in shock.

"I don't know" Krad moaned from being tired.

"You don't know? what do you mean you don't know? It looks like a hurricane hit the place then a bomb just went off after wards" I said in a gasp as I took a look of the house.

**6 hours ago after leaving.**

**2****nd**** prov**

There was a knock on the door which got Krad puzzled.

'_Probably the mail or she forgot her keys..._' he paused '_Did she? I could have sworn-_"

The door bell had been pressed continuously which broke him out off his thoughts.

"YEAH I'M COMING STOP BREAKING THE BELL" Krad yelled.

"Stupid kids" Krad muttered under his breath only to pause after opening the door.

"HI KRADDY KINS!" Dark smiled only to have the door slam in his face.

"I am not helping you in your insane quests to try and balance your relationship with her, she's still mad at you" Krad said as he leaned against the wall next to the door.

He heard a timid knock.

"Could you at least let me in" Dark whimpered.

"You'll make a mess-"

"What are you the sheriff?" Dark growled.

"Of this house? Yes so go away Kaito-"

"No can do" Dark smiled as he had just closed the door after lock picking it making Krad jump.

"How did you-?"

"She put a fault in there in case of an emergency" Dark grinned "Isn't it great? can I have hot chocolate?"

"How about a whole 3 packets of laxatives" Krad muttered under his breath.

"Nah t wouldn't taste very nice" Dark shrugged as he made himself at home. (**By putting his feet on the desk while sitting on the couch**)

"Please take your feet off the table their dirty" Krad growled while sighing. Krad finished the hot drinks and placed them down while feeling exhausted.

"No hot chocolate for you?" Dark asked.

"I figured when it comes to you I need something stronger to keep me awake" Krad massaged his temples in frustration with his eyes closed. Dark looked at him only to put a small tube over Krad's coffee and sprinkled something into it. Dark then closed the tube and hid the tube back in its proper place.

"I need to go to the bathroom" Dark said.

"Down the hall on the left but be quick about it" Krad sighed as he leaned back.

"Will do sheriff" Dark grinned and rushed off. Krad waited for a bit (**naughty man**) and sat up. He took out 3 packets of extra STRONG laxatives and poured them in.

"This should get him out the house" Krad muttered.

**Meanwhile**

Dark entered the room and messed it up completely. (**That involved ****everything**) He then entered the bathroom and totally messed it up until it looked like a bomb hit it.

"My work here is done" Dark grinned with delight and went back to the room to see Krad waiting for him.

"Had fun in there?" Krad hinted angrily which made Dark blush.

"No why would I do that?" Dark said in a high voice.

"I hope not" Krad glared.

"Why would you say that?" Dark asked.

"Remember 40 years ago. From when she was 5 and forced to be the Niwa slave. She went in to Your room due to being told to deliver food to you but heard a moaning sound. When she opened the door she saw an x-rated magazine and your hand in-"

"I get it I get it! okay! I said I was sorry to her-"

"Dark that girl was so scared for life she couldn't sleep for 15 nights straight without wetting the bed at the Hikari house" Krad cut him off.

"Alright jeez" Dark said before taking a swig of his (**Ooh boy**) hot chocolate. This made Krad grin evilly.

Dark stared.

"What are you grinning about?" Dark asked as he took a big gulp of the drink.

"N-nothing" Krad was trying hard not to laugh. So it came as a squeaky noise. Dark eyed the drink suspiciously.

"You put something in this drink didn't you?" Dark asked.

"No why would you say that?" Krad asked as he regained his composure.

"Aren't you going to drink your coffee?" Dark asked.

"Maybe later I'm up as it is" Krad replied in a bored voice.

'_Damn_' Dark muttered in his mind.

Krad shock his head and took a sip of the coffee. (**-_-'**) Which made Dark grin.

"Now what" Krad yawned "are you" yawned again while blinking in shock at the abnormal yawn.

"grinning about?" Krad yawned.

'_I could of sworn this was high in caffeine_' Krad thought as he took a gulp of it until there was nothing left of the coffee in the cup. As for Dark he'd finished his drink.

"By the way Krad. Can I mess up the house?" Dark asked sweetly only to see Krad give a weak glare.

"No why?" Krad asked with a yawn.

"No reason-" Krad's eyes widened.

"You spiked my drink with crushed sleeping pills?" Krad yelled making Dark's eyes widen with cheekily.

"Read my mind" Dark smiled only get a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach as Krad tried to fight of the long lasting sleeping pills.

"Please tell me you didn't spike my drink as well?" Dark's voice shock. Krad gave Dark a weak evil smile.

"Nothing gets... past you... Dark" Krad laughed only to fall backward and land on the floor with a huge thump.

Dark panicked as he smelt the hot chocolate.

"You put laxatives in MY drink!" Dark screamed. Dark rushed to the bathroom in a shot and tried to shut the door with a loud slam. (**He succeeded in the 3****rd**** try**).

**4 hours later**

Dark went out in a huff. Krad was still knocked out by the drug so Dark sat on the couch.

"Bleeding over kill you know that Krad!" Dark froze as he heard his stomach complain.

"Oh no not again!" Dark cried as he rushed over to the bathroom.

**Now **

**First prov again**

As I was starting to clean up the mess that had been left on the floor.

"Hey Amina" Krad yawned.

"What?" I huffed as I picked up the table cloth and was preparing to fold it into a square.

"What's for dinner?" Krad asked while yawning causing me to stop and give him the death glare that would not only put him 6 feet under but up to 18 feet.

**Warning the following scene show language of explicit nature. Viewing digression is advised as well as getting the heck out of there before the house tumbles down.**

"Have you lost your fucking monkey ass mind? WHAT IS THIS? DO I LOOK LIKE THE TOWA NO SHIROBE? DO I LOOK LIKE AS PUNK ASS FUCKING SLAVE WHO'S WILLING TO BOW DOWN BE THE CLICK OF SOMEONE'S FINGER? NO! YOU GET THE FUCKING ASS OUT THAT COUCH AND FIX THIS MESS BEFORE I SMACK THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF YOU AND SET FIRE TO YOU RIDICULOUS LONG HAIR! That includes you bloody cross ornament!" I snapped.

"In a minute" he moaned "my bones are all stiff-" he froze but didn't dare turn round to see my eyes become the size of dinner plates.

'_I'm dead_' Krad panicked.

**Outside**

A man was jogging alone in the hot day.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY!" I screamed. The man fell over causing him to break his leg from the sudden earth shake.

"I JUST ASKED YOU TO CLEAN UP THE MESS! THAT WAS LEFT ON THE FUCKING FLOOR AND YOUR COMPLAINING THAT YOU'RE TIRED!" I screamed. Causing the pipe outside to explode bring about 4 people screaming due to the impact. Inspector Saehara was driving along feeling annoyed due to the heat only to have his car screech and crash, due to a part from the pipe went onto his windscreen.

"I HAVE BEEN WORKING FOR 6 HOURS STRAIGHT WITHOUT REST SO I COULD COME EARLY TO SEE HOW YOU WERE AND I CAME HOME TO THIS **CRAP!**" I screamed causing Satoshi's house to flood leaving Risa to glare at him again before leaving him in shock.

"ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS GET UP AND HELP YOU LAZY CROSS DRESSING ARROGANT GIRLY HAIRED **SCUMBAG**!" I screamed causing the Kei and Daisuke's house to collapse followed up by another earthquake.

**9 HOURS LATER**

"YOU MUST THINK I ALLOWING YOU TO LIVE HERE FOR **FREE**!" I yelled while throwing the kitchen sink at him causing a huge bang. This made a total of 50 people watching the house to see what the commotion was about while gasping from the bangs that took place. Even Satoshi was left stunned from it all.

"Jeez don't these guys ever learn!" asked Auntie Rosie.

"Nah it was worse than Valentine's day" said Uncle Jones. (**Not real uncle just named that by everyone**)

"YOU CAN KISS MY SLAVING ALL DAY MIXED RACE! ASS!" I screamed which made the windows from outside to smash.

**1****st**** prov**

"WERE YOU JUST RAISED BY A FAMILY OF APES? CAUSE IF THAT'S TRUE THEN I'VE GOT A QUESTION... HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND? HAVE YOU?" I screamed. Krad on the other hand was left stunned and petrified.

"I-It wasn't m-m-my f-fault. D-D-Dark drugged me I-I-I was-s s-sent t-to s-sleep" Krad stuttered.

I froze in shock

"What?" I asked in anger "Dark did this?" I glared as I tried to keep calm, Krad nodded furiously while still scared.

"DARK MOUSEY!" I screamed loudly making the whole Niwa household blow up while the whole family was left stunned. While Daiki was left embarrassed, since he was sitting on the toilet seat with the newspaper and like the whole family was covered in soot, ash and plaster.

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**well I'd say he's in for it now.**

** No flames please but what did you think?**


	3. Lesson 3 why you shouldn't anger her

**part 3 I own nothing except the girl and rabbit. I'm just a person who is inspired too much same as part 1 and 2.  
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**Lesson 3: why you shouldn't anger her when she had a gun**

Dark, Krad and Satoshi were in hospital being treated for broken bones, disc locations from the spine and a shot gun wound (**Dark) **in the arm. Luckily Krad was knocked out but hocked on to morphine.

The Doctor came in to see me really cheesed off before going inside the room.

"Can you tell me if you're related?"

"To those Baboons? Nah just blue boy's my cousin due to our great grandparents being twins" I huffed.

"O-okay" he smiled nervously.

"Whatever can you tell me when the dumb blond is going home? I'm already cheesed off at the violet haired and his ego for causing trouble" I asked.

"You shot me! So I can't help being here!" Dark yelled from next door.

"And you dislocated a disc from my spine!" Satoshi hollered.

"Well excuse me but who messed my house up!" I said angrily- silence echoed in the room.

"Who may I add pricked me with a cactus and who also tried to get me in a trap just to get back at me for 'ruining' your date?" I yelled. More silence echoed while the other patients where cowering in their beds.

"Well the diagnostics says: You 3 are a pack of idiots and the prescription is- To stop annoying her when she is stressed from work" said the doctor as he read the chart.

"As an added bonus you 3 shall be spending the whole 3 months in hospital for operations and recovery then a whole 5 years in jail for vandalism, injury and harassment" The doctor said as he went off.

"What?" Dark stared in shock.

"Also Dark you insurance had been canceled and Mr Hiwatari. Your 'Father's' will stated to cut you off immediately from money and health insurance" the doctor read more making me grin. However Satoshi's face went pale from the news.

'_I did that_' I grinned cheekily only to look at the doors open-

"AAAAH! MY LEG!" yelled a very disturbed teenage boy who then just saw me.

"Weren't you in New Jersey?" he asked me while puzzled.

"No Vaati, no I wasn't but where's Link?"

"He's in the A.N.E due to-"

"Using an arrow to cut his neck, yeah I know" I sighed.

"Why are you here?" He asked only to flinch from the doctor patching his leg up.

"Oh! Those 3 thought it was funny to gang up on me so I grabbed a gun and shot Dark in the arm, Satoshi almost broke my ankle so I karate chopped his spine dislocating a disc in the progress-"

"Wait wait! You used a gun? When was this?" Vaati asked.

"Today" I replied.

"And you kept it from me? Jeez! I could have used it to get Link out my house-"

"I thought it was you Granddad's house" I interrupted leaving him to sulk.

"Well I'm off" I replied.

"You're leaving already? what about them?" he asked.

"They can manage from here, I'll send flowers" I smiled with a wave.

'_More like a nail filler in case you're in prison since you have no insurance those 3 aren't so lucky_' I said to Vaati's mind.

"You a good sister in law" he smiled.

"I try when I can" I shrugged with a smile only to have an object fall out my bag.

"Hey sis! You dropped you-" he grinned at the nail filler lying so innocently on the floor. While sparkling as if mocking him.

He reached forward only to fail a couple of times but-

"Aaah!" he screamed as he fell on to the floor however:

"HOLY G (censored)ess! My leg!" he cried. "Nurse help me I've fallen! But I can't get back up!" Vaati cried more.

"Be quiet!" yelled a nurse who was playing solitaire.

'Oh well at least I've got nail filler" Vaati grinned.

"Kyuu?" said a familiar rabbit.

"Hello there little rabbit can you get the- HEY THIEF GET THAT BACK!" Vaati yelled as Wiz stole the nail filler and brought it to Dark who grinned.

"Works every time" Dark chuckled.

"Kyua?" said another white rabbit with blue eyes.

"Uh oh OUCH! NURSE RABID RABBIT!" Dark yelled as the rabbit not only slapped him but took the nail filler.

"Wiz! Get that rabbit!" Dark yelled only to freeze.

"(Get out of my way brother or you'll have no limbs to support you ever again)" the rabbit growled.

"(Yes Awazu sister)" Wiz said fearfully (**Wow whipped by his little sister**) leaving her to hop gracefully to Vaati.

"Oh no you don't!" Dark yelled as he released an energy ball which not only broke the nail filler but gave Awazu a concussion.

"Dark you just injured a rabbit! That's animal cruelty!" I yelled which got them all sweating.

"Another 10 years should teach all of you on behalf of the NSPCC your all fined 60 thousand yen, enjoy" I said in a huff. I scooped Awazu up and left leaving them to deal with the animal protesters outside who were caught wind of it- On hospital camera's that were already on YouTube.

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**And that's it I hoped you liked it read and review no flames please**


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